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Thursday, March 01, 2007
28th Febuary 2007. Let's just see...from now on, i'm not gonna initiate any more communication. I'm tired. Let's just see how long it is before we become strangers again. 6 years ago the friendship started. 6 years ago my heart started to die. I'm tired. 6 years ago I was a happy boy. 6 years later, my heart no longer knows joy. Joy used to be like air, always around me, always flowing within me. Today, joy is something i experience once a week with the kids, something i occasionally feel when something nice happens. You broke my heart. Falling in love with you was the greatest mistake in my life. 6 years of friendship, and i feel less close to you as when i first started knowing you. Gave up 1 relationship because I still loved you more than anyone else. Was it worth it? Maybe not. Do you really know me? Do you even care for me? Do you know how upset I was when my turtle died? Did you console me? Do you even remember me telling you before how that was the one thing that will see me at my saddest and lowest point in life? I doubt it. 6 years as my "hao xiong di", how many birthdays have you even spent with me? I'm not a materialistic person, but sometimes it's the thought, or lack of thought that makes me sad. 6 years as my friend, how many birthday presents have i ever recieved from you?. One. In these 6 years, how many times have you rejected me when I asked you out? How many times have you even asked me out?. For the latter question, I think the fingers on my one palm would suffice for the purpose of counting. How much of me do you know? How much of what you know came from asking me about how i think? How much of it was volunteered to you? Do you even know me? In these 6 years, there's only been twice i recieved an sms from you asking me how I was. Do you know how hard I tried to get you to like me? Did it even matter? Did i even ever made you feel touched? I totally don't feel I did. What else can I do? I don't know. When was the last time we realy had a chance to really sit down to talk about life? If I'm not wrong, that was probably a year plus ago at Simply Bread. Do you even remember that?. I'm tired. Regards, your Hao Xiong Di.
++ quoth dragonfly at 8:09 PM |